It feels like every New York-based influencer these days is claiming to be a real-life Carrie Bradshaw.

Among them is Eli Rallo, a 24-year-old content creator who got her start posting snack mix videos on her TikTok account “The Jarr” in 2020. Rallo has since adapted her social media presence to be the internet’s “big sister,” posting near-constant snippets of advice, personal anecdotes and pop culture references for her TikTok audience of over 800 thousand followers.

Now, Rallo is taking Bradshaw’s Sex and the City advice-author persona to the next level by releasing a book of dating and romance advice, titled “I Didn’t Know I Needed This.” The book feels like her online persona brought to life, the content focusing on boosting girls’ confidence in dating and in themselves. 

But, “I Didn’t Know I Needed This” still left me wanting — needing — more. 

As a follower of Rallo since her snack jar days, I am well-versed in Rallo’s over-the-top and unapologetic content style. Her monthly “ins and outs posts” accept or reject everything from teeth whitening to “Aquaphor and stalking on Zillow.” Her Instagram feed is dotted with iconic pop culture moments such as Kris Jenner drinking a martini, Taylor Swift out to dinner with her friends and, of course, dozens of stills from Sex and the City. I hoped she would bring a unique perspective to the literary world. 

But, her book feels like a partial manifestation of this energy. It is structured into chapters based on different stages of dating: from single, to talking stage, to first dates and so on. Each chapter starts with one of her iconic lists of “rules” to guide the structure of the chapter. The division of the book makes it more helpful for case-by-case situations, an encyclopedia you can consult with relationship troubles. 

However, I wished for more of Rallo’s signature, goofy fun. While the book took a casual, conversational approach to dating advice, Rallo’s voice failed to shine through — even while listening to the audiobook. Her attempt to keep her voice relevant to younger audiences felt forced. 

I attribute the book’s need for more personality to its topic. While Rallo is a self-proclaimed dating expert, her advice didn’t add anything new to what’s available on the Internet. And, it feels like no one asked for it.  

Although Rallo focuses a lot of her social media on dating advice, her best content comes with her niche relatability and randomness, which was unfortunately missing from her writing. Rallo, a graduate of Columbia Journalism School, has a clean and straightforward writing style that is, at times, a bit cheesy. 

I would have loved to see a book with the same chaotic energy as her TikTok and Instagram, centered around advice on navigating your 20s or finding general happiness. While I appreciated an approach to dating that was focused on self-love and confidence, I hoped Rallo would have more to say that was unique –– even if that would have shifted the book’s topic to more general life advice.

However, as far as dating advice books go, this book is one of the better choices. Rallo, who is in a committed relationship, has a perspective that is refreshingly honest. Her advice is centered around dating as something that shouldn’t be stressful and, more importantly, isn’t essential to a happy life.

While the book lacked the exaggerated charm and wit seen on her Tik Tok at times, her stories were engaging and occasionally helpful. If I lacked familiarity with Rallo’s online personality, I’d likely be less disappointed with the release. 

Despite her lackluster writing, I could see Rallo’s career growing from here. Her national book tour has sold out in several venues, and she doesn’t seem to have plans to stop writing. Maybe Rallo is just warming up with “I Didn’t Know I Needed This,” and there is more, goofy, literary fun to come — hopefully.

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Twitter: @emilymlichty

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