Before June, long distance for some Northwestern couples might’ve looked like the 20-minute walk down Sheridan Road from North to South Campus.
But with summer’s arrival, many students in relationships face thousands of miles of separation — and no convenient Intercampus Shuttle to mitigate the distance.
Rising McCormick junior May Cruz said she and her boyfriend have been dating since April, and this is her first time doing long distance since high school.
“I think I’ve matured a lot since then, I would say,” Cruz said. “I think that our relationship has a stronger foundation than maybe that last time. So I’m just going into it with a very open mind knowing that we’re both busy.”
Cruz will be based in Tennessee this summer, and her boyfriend is working in Chicago.
She said they mostly communicate via text during the day, with the understanding that they both have busy work schedules and may not be able to respond immediately. She also said they try to talk on FaceTime a few times a week.
“FaceTiming is always really nice because it’s always just nice to hear somebody’s voice and see them, even if they’re not immediately with you,” Cruz said.
Rising Weinberg junior Paige Glowacki echoed the importance of communication in long distance relationships. She is working in New York this summer, while her girlfriend lives in Cleveland.
Beyond calling and texting, Glowacki and her girlfriend, who met through Marriage Pact in the fall, have found ways to do their favorite activities together in a virtual setting.
“We’ve been watching ‘Love Island’ together, and we both like to do paint by numbers, so she sent me a paint by number, and we do that together too,” Glowacki said.
For both Cruz and Glowacki, one challenging aspect of long distance is managing expectations for when connection is possible.
Lethicia Foadjo, a registered social worker and psychotherapist based in Ontario, Canada, said discussing suppositions before beginning long distance is crucial to a relationship’s success.
“Setting expectations before you start being apart is a much better way than already being in the distress of not being together and trying to come up with a plan on the go,” Foadjo said.
Foadjo suggested couples give each other a meaningful object before being separated that “ties you throughout the summer before you’re able to be with each other again.”
Cruz said that while long distance is hard, she believes it is important to maintain one’s individuality in a relationship.
“I feel like in the last couple of months, especially Spring Quarter, I really was spending a lot of time with him, and I love that, but I also think it’s important that now that I’m in a relationship, I know that I’m still okay to be my own person and spend time on my own,” Cruz said.
Glowacki also expressed her excitement about exploring a new city on her own. She said she and her girlfriend plan to visit each other in July and August.
She said she believes her relationship will be stronger after a summer apart.
“It does suck going through it, but I think it does make you stronger and more appreciative of what you have,” Glowacki said.
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