As a kid I collected paper towel and toilet paper rolls for arts and crafts. Now, I collect rubber ducks, library cards and articles of clothing from boys I’ve been romantically involved with in some capacity.
Does this make me a kleptomaniac? I don’t think so. Especially since nobody has asked for any of their stuff back. Except for one boy from freshman year, but I gave it back — I had to, he had one of my shirts and proposed a swap.
My collection is an impressive hoard: a few t-shirts, a couple pairs of socks, a hat, baseball jersey and, of course, the most coveted items of all: hoodies.
At the moment, my collection consists of three hoodies.
The first one I acquired lives at home. I never brought it to school, but I probably should — it’s kinda dope.
That’s not why I kept it though. It seemed only fair for me to, because the stranger it belonged to kept something of mine too. I don’t really miss it, but sometimes I do. As much as I like collecting souvenirs, I know that in order to participate in the gift economy one must give willingly.
The second hoodie is a classic, and I’m saving it for the day people see it and associate it with me, not the guy I got it from.
Because, really, it’s so me. It has text on the hood, which is my favorite place for there to be a graphic on a hoodie. It’s a little tight, though.
Regardless, I can’t wait to wear that one again. I think the time will come soon enough.
And then there’s the last one, the one I often lounge in. I don’t know why I wouldn’t — it’s so cute and oversized and, no, that’s actually it.
I don’t feel bad for keeping it because the guy it belonged to told me he didn’t like it. I really cannot comprehend why. I won’t poke the bear.
Memories are precious but hard to keep stock of — I like having tangible reminders of the different lives I’ve lived. I haven’t added to my collection in quite some time, though.
So, if you’re reading this and have something to add to my collection, let’s reconvene when I’m back in the States, for the sake of reconnaissance, of course. And on the off chance you’re reading this I have something of yours: I welcome you to ask for it back.
I’ll probably say, “No. Sorry!”
But I’m not evil. Depending on the day, I’d be willing to trade a gift more worthy of treasuring than a Comfort Colors tee or Gildan sweatshirt.
My heart?
Nah, I’m going to keep protecting her for a bit. But, I have some rubber ducks to spare.
Sylvie Slotkin is a Medill junior. She can be contacted at [email protected]. If you would like to respond publicly to this op-ed, send a Letter to the Editor to [email protected]. The views expressed in this piece do not necessarily reflect the views of all staff members of The Daily Northwestern.
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