Every academic quarter, Northwestern students scramble to snag their classes for the next term. One coveted course was in many registration carts this quarter — but good luck getting in.
SESP Prof. Alexandra Solomon teaches Marriage 101, which is turning 25 years old this year. Nine to 12 teaching assistants typically help out with the 100-person class, which covers the topic of relationships. Solomon said the course places a large emphasis on small group activities, which is facilitated by the group of TAs.
“I probably have responded to 50 to 100 emails so far this week from students who didn’t get in the class,” Solomon said. “The class filled in pre-registration, and the waitlist filled by 8:30 on the first day of regular registration. … It’s terrible. If I could teach 500 students every year, I would.”
Assignments include asking elders in your family about their love stories — and even asking someone on a date, regardless of your relationship status.
Each year, Solomon and her teaching assistants recruit 75 couples to act as mentors for students.
“It’s the most logistical nightmare in the world,” Solomon said. “Every year. I think, ‘Okay, no more mentor couple assignments.’ It’s too much work. But every year, I do it again because it’s such a unique thing. Like, when do college students ever get to sit with 50-year-olds in the UK and listen to their love story and then write a paper about it?”
The course was developed by Psychology Prof. Bill Pinsof and Feinberg Prof. Arthur Nielsen in 2000. Solomon has helped teach the class since its inception — when she was a teaching assistant herself in graduate school.
She took the reins 10 years ago.
“It’s been my baby since before I had actual babies. I’m now the mom of two college students,” Solomon said. “I’ve taught the class pregnant, and I taught the class team sleep deprived, and now I’m teaching the class when I’ve got kids who are the same age as my students. It’s just such a beautiful part of my world.”
Nielsen said he and Pinsof both conceived the idea for the course. Pinsof had been teaching a course about the sociology of marriage, but it was more so a formal academic course rather than a self-help course.
After 20 years of couple therapist experience, Nielsen said he was struck by how “clueless” so many people were about marriage, especially considering high divorce rates. He found this especially interesting after having his own divorce and remarriage.
Nielsen thought that college seemed like a natural time to implement more marriage education.
“The programs for marriage education or emotional education were mostly in high school or for people right about when they were going to get married,” Nielsen said. “Even though those are good, I think they had drawbacks.”
As they workshopped the curriculum, Nielsen said he and Pinsof recruited NU students to help them develop it. They did so by interviewing couples therapists — including Nielsen and Pinsof, themselves.
While Solomon said the title Marriage 101 has stayed constant, the demographic has changed with time. With the average age at which people get married having increased, Solomon said there used to be a minority of students who were engaged while taking the class, but that isn’t the case now.
“It truly did use to be a class about the study of marriage, and over the years, I really had evolved it to be a class designed to help you grow relational self-awareness,” Solomon said. “We spend a lot of time now talking about dating, breakups, long distance relationships (and) family.”
Medill and SESP senior Liam Hubbard called the course “fantastic,” and said he took it when he got into a new relationship. He said he learned how to better handle conflict, for example, and applied such lessons to his relationship.
Hubbard said after battling for a spot in the course, you may expect to battle for a spot in office hours.
“Her office hours are so popular that she put these sticky notes outside of her door, and each sticky note would be a 10-minute slot,” Hubbard said. “Having the chance to talk with her one-on-one is just like an incredible experience because she’s already such a good lecturer.”
Solomon said these days, people often ask her how much longer she will continue teaching the course.
She doesn’t plan to stop anytime soon.
“I guess I would stop doing it when I don’t get giddy about doing it. I just love it so much. Like, it makes me cheerful,” Solomon said. “I feel really confident that the students leave with something that’s going to be like a part of them.”
Email: [email protected]
X: @_melodyxu
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