Patni: A social perspective on senior year
September 27, 2015
I don’t remember being more shocked recently than when someone I’d never seen before on campus randomly approached me at Six Flags.
“Hey, I’m Nick! Where are you from?”
It had to be a freshman.
Northwestern’s campus culture means that seniors interact primarily with those they already know, limited by their existing social circles. Living off campus, not going to dining halls, slowly cutting down on extracurricular commitments and taking primarily smaller 300-level classes by their last year of college means that the majority rarely make new, lasting friends and that introductions require using a corner of the brain that hasn’t been accessed since freshman year.
Maybe it’s because my last year at NU has finally, scarily, arrived or because I spent my summer in New York, but I’ve suddenly realized the unique culture our campus has when it comes to arguably the most important aspect of college: our social lives. With every passing year at NU, it becomes harder to meet someone new or to branch out to a different set of friends. Granted, we lose the desire to constantly introduce ourselves and to put in the effort to make new friends and, sometimes, keep in touch with old ones. Still, even if we wanted to, it’s not easy. The social fabric of NU doesn’t permit you to take new friendships forward unless your path crosses someone else’s in a major way – i.e. you’re in the same sorority, class, club or dorm as them. And you shouldn’t have to go Greek just to meet new people. After all, that’s not how the real world works. The Midwest is supposed to be friendlier than the East Coast, but does that “niceness” translate to a better social life for us here in Evanston? I’m thinking no.
When I was in New York this summer, I could meet a total stranger on a night out, and the next second I’d already be planning the next time we’d hang out – and, shockingly, it would actually happen. Not only that, but we’d bring other people from different social groups together and everyone would become friends. My best friend might even get along with this “stranger” better than I do, and just like that I’d create a lasting friendship after just ten minutes of conversation on a random night out – and this scenario could happen every night. Perhaps it’s a reflection of how social life works post-college, but I think it’s a deeper statement of the open social fabric of a city like New York and how receptive people are to cultivating new friendships. Rarely will you hang out with the same group of friends in NYC every week, but at NU, that’s the norm year after year. Chances are that if you run into someone new on campus, you’ll both automatically go through the necessary polite introductions while taking it for granted that, despite going to the same school, you’ll probably never talk to each other again.
I used “Free & For Sale” on Facebook a few weeks ago to buy something from a random girl on campus who I hadn’t met before. Upon meeting her, I instantly knew if I hung out with this girl a few times, we could become good friends. Although I could easily make that happen in New York, it would go against the status quo here. What if both of us lost out on a potentially significant friend just by staying in our pre-existing comfort zones? It’s easy to play the busy card in the middle of classes and job recruitment, but we all definitely have more time on our hands to meet new people than we act like we do.
Sure, some think New York is too fast-paced and having a few close friends is better than having many superficial ones, but I think you miss out by not constantly meeting new people, especially when the opportunity is literally right outside your door. Research has shown that quality is better than quantity, but introducing fresh energy into your life in the form of new people results in stronger, deeper friendships and more personal satisfaction. New relationships widen your horizons, help you grow and make you more open-minded. The ability that New York has to make people from different walks of life come together in the chaos, busyness and energy of a vibrant, constantly on-the-go city is what differentiated it from my home for the last three years – Evanston. I love NU and I’ve had the best years of my life here, but as a senior it’s blatantly evident that people are deeply settled into their self-created bubbles on campus. These bubbles prove difficult for their inhabitants to escape from – or to even want to escape from – and this restricts the social potential of NU.
I shouldn’t automatically assume that someone who wants to know where I’m from is a freshman, because the best last year of college for me will be to act like I’m still a freshman too, and to take advantage of our gorgeous campus and all the talented people who will call it their home for four years. As they say, when in Evanston, live like the New Yorkers do. Or maybe only I say that – but that’s fine with me.
Tanisha Patni is a Weinberg senior. She can be contacted at tanishapatni2016@u.
The views expressed in this piece do not necessarily reflect the views of all staff members of The Daily Northwestern.
