Let me start by presenting several common scenes: you’re heading to class down Sheridan Road, you scan Norbucks looking for an empty table or you waltz with your friends into a fraternity party. In most cases, you see someone you recognize. You know their first and last name, and you probably know at least five facts about their life.

Common courtesy would indicate that you walk over and say hi, but instead you pretend you don’t see them, and if a mutual friend introduces you, you act like it’s the first time you’ve heard of them.

In college, we are constantly meeting new people, but when we don’t solidify a friendship or even an acquaintanceship with these people, we fear saying hi. Why? Do we think they won’t remember us, or are we afraid that we won’t have enough to say and things will get awkward? Who should make the first move – if he looks like he doesn’t recognize me, why is it my responsibility to say hi?

Of course, there is always the chance that they’re looking in another direction and actually don’t see you. No one expects you to jump and down screaming names as you walk into Tech. But more often than not, you’re faking it.

We pretend we don’t see the people whose names we know, whose pictures we stalk on Facebook, whose stories we hear from mutual friends. We avoid making eye contact so that we can avoid saying hi.

Maybe this stems from experiences we’ve had when we did decide to take initiative: How many of us have started to wave to one of these half-friends, and they awkwardly block our attempt by suddenly turning to their phone? No text message is so urgent that it can’t wait for a quick real-life greeting.

What makes these situations more interesting is our communication and social network situation. Maybe you had a class with someone or worked with them in a student group. At the time, it felt like you were best friends, so you exchanged numbers and became Facebook friends. But after a summer without contact, you feel like you have nothing to talk about anymore, and stop acknowledging each other in real life. You still get mass texts from each other, inviting you to parties, and you still have access to all the information published on Facebook, but when you come out from behind your screens, the friendship is gone.

What is the point of this? Why do we continue to follow people on Facebook, but won’t own up to knowing them in real life? Why do we deny ourselves continued friendships because we can’t get over the fear of not being remembered, even though the other person probably fears the same thing?

It’s possible that we think that they won’t live up to their virtual self or the brief first impression they initially gave us. Or maybe we’re shyer than we’d like to admit – we don’t want to risk a hello when we don’t have the guarantee of getting one back.

If I’ve been introduced to you once, I’d rather us both remember and acknowledge it, so that the next time we end up talking, we can start from where we left off, instead of restarting at square one, shaking hands and exchanging names.

We all recognize more of the people we have met than we admit. I’m guilty of this, but I promise I won’t think it’s weird if you say hi on the street, even if we only met once.

Meredith Wise is a Weinberg junior. She can be reached at [email protected].