As much as I hate to give it any more focus than necessary, this column is about the Idiot’s Great American Monetizing Machine.
Known more commonly as reality television, the Machine started out modestly enough. It began with innocent if frivolous shows such as “Survivor” and “Real World” as the fuel that first began to turn its cogs. Unfortunately, as has become increasingly evident, the once frivolous world of reality television has metastasized into something far more virulent.
Reality television started out with the premise that it would be interesting to jam a bunch of colorful people into strange situations and film the outcome. And it was: It was funny to watch that nudist on “Survivor” and the crying drunks on “Real World,” but it was nothing too dangerous.
As time went on, entertainment execs recognized the selling power the crazies brought to reality television ratings. Suddenly, shows like “Flavor of Love” cropped up, a program that makes money on the collective idiocy of a few miserable individuals. It’s already operating on a pretty low plane, but once you find the show hypes itself by advertising “dates at Red Lobster and a new set of gold teeth signifying true love,” you recognize it also deals in crude racial stereotypes. These are the goods of the Machine.
The Idiot’s Great American Monetizing Machine works by putting deplorable behavior in one end and – ka-ching! ka-ching! ka-ching! – out the other end come ad dollars. It takes the most toxic aspects of human nature and turns them into the participant’s bread and butter.
Consider the recent balloon hoax in which two parents pretended their young child was trapped on a balloon in order to generate media attention – scraps they might be able to put in one end of the Machine and coax out money from the other end in the form of a new show. In this enterprise, they brought their nervous children on air. Out of anxiety, one child vomited on the national program his parents forced him on.
Or consider Rod Blagojevich, who just sat down Monday before a judge to ask if he could be permitted to appear on “Celebrity Apprentice” during his trial. This is the second such request after he already was rejected for “I’m a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here!” In one end of the Machine, Blagojevich hopes to jam in his attempts to betray the people of Illinois; out the other, he knows he’ll find a couple of those precious dollars.
Do not doubt it: The Idiot’s Great American Monetizing Machine is chugging at full force. Over the past week, we’ve seen the force with which it can belch out abysmal behavior in the craven quest for more ad dollars. Think about it the next time before choosing which shows you watch.
Weinberg senior Mac LeBuhn can be reached at [email protected].
