Advertisement lovers, this weekend is your Super Bowl: the Super Bowl.

In the United States, there is only one time a year when television viewers tend to stay tuned during the ads, and that’s the night of the NFL title game. So with Sunday’s match up featuring two small-market teams, many of the game’s 90 million viewers will be primarily focused on the commercials.

This year, a 30-second spot during NBC’s telecast will cost you about $3 million. To give you an idea of how much money this is, imagine someone who’s a millionaire. Now imagine three of those people. That’s how much a 30-second Super Bowl ad costs. I, on the other hand, would be happy to mention your product in my next column for a mere 50 bucks. Your move, corporate America.

Here’s the thing, though: Even after taking a very informative IMC class last quarter (thanks, John Lavine!), I still don’t understand the logic behind a lot of commercials. Some of them work wonders, but others actually compel me to boycott companies. I mean at this point, I’m pretty sure I can save big money at Menard’s, but I will refuse to use Geico as long as they keep employing that freaking gecko. Come on, people, those ads were tired about four years ago. Time to move on.

Come to think of it, absurdity in advertising is pretty prominent nowadays, especially when it comes to diet soda and insurance. Take Diet Dr Pepper, which is an excellent beverage, by the way. In their ads, why do they choose to associate their product with candy and pastries? When I’m in the mood for some calorie-free refreshment, the last thing I’m thinking is “liquid cake.” Also, are there still 23 flavors in Diet Dr Pepper, or is that distinction reserved for the original? Shouldn’t the company’s ads be addressing pertinent issues like these?

Or how about that new commercial where LeBron James plays football for the Cleveland Browns? Did you know that’s for State Farm? How the hell is LeBron James going to get me interested in buying insurance? I mean, I could understand if they used someone who had been a huge bust during their athletic career – say, Ryan Leaf. Just imagine Leaf standing out there next to an Allstate agent, warning us to never be too careful. That’s commercial gold!

See, here’s how I think about it: If you’re a TV viewer, you’re just looking to be entertained, and that’s the best thing a Super Bowl ad can do. But for companies, these commercials establish an image, be it good or bad. Remember Diet Pepsi’s “Brown and Bubbly” campaign back in 2006? If not, it’s probably because they stopped running the ads soon after the big game. Well, either that or you blocked it out because “brown and bubbly” is more likely to remind you of the aftermath of a Taco Bell run than America’s second-favorite cola. What really amazes me, though, is that marketing experts, PepsiCo executives and focus groups all must have approved that slogan before it hit the airwaves. Man, our society can be messed up.

So what do this year’s ads have in store? I guess we won’t know until Sunday. But I hope they include some talking babies. Those things are awesome.