Today marks the fourth day of the Writers Guild of America strike, and I must say that I am both inspired and dismayed.

Several sitcoms and late night talk shows are already off the air, and although many shows have stockpiled episodes, hour-long dramas are soon to follow.

Picketers are already attacking everything we hold dear. On Tuesday, they surrounded a “Desperate Housewives” set chanting, “We write the story-a, Eva Longoria.”

After I overcame my initial shock that this was the best chant Hollywood writers could come up with, I decided they were probably on strike from writing their own slogans too (or they really wanted Eva to know they wrote the story). Either way, Eva gave them some pizza, which would probably stop me from striking.

Anyway, if you are like me, you are probably worried about two things right now.

First, what is going to happen to that bottle cap I swallowed? (We’ll find out tomorrow.) And second, what am I going to do when there is no good TV to watch?

Well if you are thinking of starting a crime spree, I wouldn’t recommend that (wink). The police around here are extremely good at catching muggers and thieves. I also wouldn’t recommend throwing rocks at a skunk. It’s not as fun as it sounds.

I was, however, so inspired by the Writers Guild of America fighting for what they want that I decided to go on strike myself. That’s right Northwestern, I’m fighting for what we deserve. In fact, I’ve been going on strikes all week.

First, I tried going on strike from class until I receive an A. Instead of learning, I sat home watching “Law and Order.” When my roommate told me that this was no different than any other Tuesday I told him he had a fat head and he didn’t know anything about economics.

Unfortunately, I then received a problem set that I failed, proving that I didn’t know anything about economics either (in case we have similar powers of deduction, it was an economics problem set). It seems my professor had called my bluff, so I went back to learning.

I also tried going on a hunger strike, but that failed as well because I got really hungry. So, in a last ditch effort to get what I truly deserve, I will be joining my writing brethren and going on strike from The Daily.

Listen closely editors because I’m not writing another word until you meet these demands (except these words and the following words): 1) Eva Longoria delivers me a pizza.

Surprised? I am too, but that’s the way these things go some times. Your move, Daily editors. Maybe – just maybe – I will see you next week.

Weinberg senior Alec Hayden can be reached at [email protected].