I feel sorry for meteorologists in towns like Amityville, where thunderstorms evidently appear without warning and are accompanied by ungodly amounts of lightning. The local electric company must have it rough, too — lights in this town never seem to work.
So what does this mean for you, the potential viewer of rookie director Andrew Douglas’ latest thriller, “The Amityville Horror?” Lots of obnoxious killing scenes lit exclusively by copious stroboscopic thunderstorms.
“The Amityville Horror” was written and produced by the same people who brought you 2003’s surprisingly eerie remake of “The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.” You’ll find a similarly adequate supply of axe-murdering and grotesquely disturbing images here, with an added bonus of failed religious undertones.
More truthful than “Massacre,” “The Amityville Horror” is founded on the story of an actual family murder that took place in November 1974. The film follows the Lutz family, who moved into the family’s house one year after the murders and left with media-friendly ghost stories. This script exploits their “experiences,” now accepted as a hoax, fabricated for the sake of money and fame. They win. We lose.
As horror — forgive me, “thriller” — films and their audiences become lazier, producers of movies like “The Amityville Horror” seem less concerned with plot clarity. Certain members of the Lutz family can see ghosts while others inexplicably cannot. And we understand that father George Lutz (Ryan Reynolds) is somehow possessed, but it’s never explained why.
To its credit, though, “The Amityville Horror” never loses sight of its 1970s American setting, and while it’s hard to believe that mother Kathy Lutz (28-year-old bombshell Melissa George) has borne three children, the film successfully maintains its creepy antiquity.
Still, this “true story” barely stands on its own two legs, and I doubt even a competent local meteorologist or electrician could offer effective support.
— Kevin Brown