Rise and shine, friends. It’s Nov. 4. Election Day. Obama time. For many of us, this is the only presidential election for which we’ll be in college. Whether you’re in your first year or your last, this may be the only time you’ll ever get to knock on doors, paint banners or wear stylish buttons without being considered “too political.” Cherish it.

As I look back on this insane, long-winded, scandalous, surprising, puzzling, vicious and incredible election, I’m happy to be only hours away from the finish line. It’s finally Election Day, and by the time I wake up tomorrow, this country will have a new president.

But I had an extremely difficult time writing this week’s column. I mean, I’m the Tuesday columnist. A combination of the Roman calendar and the Constitution has basically chosen my column’s subject matter. But what the hell do I write about?

I can address how young people are excited about politics now more than ever. They’re voting, they’re canvassing, they’re becoming miniature campaign managers in the microcosm of society that is the college campus. Boring.

But then, I could also talk about the huge Grant Park rally. Whether or not you support Obama, it’s undeniable that this rally is historical and could be anything from a chaotic fiasco to a monumental celebration. Tickets are scarce, and it seems the only way left to get in is to offer yourself for an hour or two of “fun” to one of the many eccentric creepers on Craigslist.

And then I can talk about the bare essentials: Vote, period. If you have even the slightest interest in how this country works and what your future looks like, you’ll know that the right thing to do is to vote. The way I see it, by not voting you’re relinquishing your right to have an opinion for the next four years. You have a chance to change the world. Do it.

But then there’s the big daddy issue: Do I use this column to push my own political views?

By now, you should know who you’re voting for. Most students have voted absentee anyway, and it’s not like I’m going to sway anyone with 500 words of impressive logic and punditry. But what kind of columnist would I be if I didn’t give my opinion on the candidates and repeat the same things that have been said for the last year?

I think John McCain is an old man. He is elderly. He was born two months after “Gone with the Wind” was published. That’s right, the book.

I think Sarah Palin’s children have some of the most unorthodox names you could possibly give. I’m not making assumptions, but I would enjoy watching her be a contestant on “Are You Smarter Than A 5th Grader?”

I think Joe Biden is just cool. He would be fun to hang out with and get a milkshake with. He, like McCain, is old.

And I think Obama is possibly the most exciting candidate to have graced a presidential election since JFK.

There. I’m done. No more pundits, no more scandals. The election is almost over, and I’ve made my opinions known to the free world. God bless the college newspaper.