Rock, chalk, Jayhawk?
Folks, it’s still football season. And although I am pee-my-pants excited for the upcoming men’s hoops season, I am admittedly peeved about a recent trend in sports media. (What’s new?) For one reason or another, we’ve been listening to these three aforementioned words for weeks now from corny broadcasters and uncreative Sportscenter anchors. Don’t get me wrong. It’s a given that this is a very cute line. Every time unicorns and gummy bears hear the words on Rainbow Mountain, they smile and giggle and frolic gaily in pastures of pink grass. Yet, there is something so odd, so peculiar about hearing these three words while the leaves are still changing colors. And there’s something to be said for my ears bleeding. Kinda weird.
Well, consider the mystery solved: Kansas University has an undefeated football phenomenon.
Is it a miracle? It depends of what your definition of the word is. First and foremost, Hollywood hasn’t started to make a movie about the third-ranked Jays. I guess that right is reserved for the 1980 U.S. Hockey team that defeated communism (not to be confused with the fictional account of Rocky IV).
But, if you think seeing Jesus in a grilled cheese sandwich is miraculous, then I believe the surreal reality that is a 10-0 Kansas squad should qualify as well.
Unlike the “pretender-contenders” (patent-pending) of yesterday – the South Floridas, Arizona States and Boston Colleges of the college football world – the Jayhawks appear to be for real.
The team has marched through its regular season, beating up on Big 12 foes left and right while embarrassing storied programs in front of national audiences. The people in Lawrence, Kan., must be going bonkers. They haven’t been able to root for a football team this good since Hank Stram introduced gatorade to his gridiron gangsters and lead the Chiefs to a victory in Super Bowl IV. And after witnessing their ‘hawks topple hated-rival No. 24 Kansas State in Manhattan, Kan., sneak past Texas A&M in College Station, Texas, and beat Nebraska at home so bad (76-39) that the Cornhuskers had to take it out on Kansas State the next week, all of the Jayhawks fans might have forgotten – if just for a fleeing instant – that they even had a basketball team. Certainly, Nebraska coach Bill Callahan would like to forget about his team’s performance against the historically woeful school from the cornfields of “Flyover America.” Heck, even he’s gone crazy if his last press conference is any indication. In the 117 years of their existence, the Cornhuskers’ defense hasn’t been that badly spanked since they came out of their metaphorical college football mother’s womb.
But I don’t say this without warning. A caveat lector, if you will: The idea of posing KU as a legitimate threat for a BCS bowl is done with supreme pessimism and precaution.
Yet, even with this admonishment, its easy to recognize that the Jayhawks have talent. Quarterback Todd Reesing is a pro prospect with an arm like a Civil War cannon. Corner Aqib Talib (a Playboy Preseason All-American, mind you) is the best in the country at his position and has NFL scouts drooling, journalists comparing him to Champ Bailey and people nominating him as a “Player to Watch” for the Walter Camp Player of the Year. And then there is the coach, Mark Mangino, who took over Kansas’ failing and flailing football program in 2002. Having never played football himself, “Macho Mangino” has compiled a 35-35 record over his short tenure and brought hope into a previously lifeless sport in Lawrence. A longtime crony of Ohio State coach Jim Tressel (having graduated from Youngstown State in 1987) and a protege of mastermind Bill Synder at Kansas State (having been an assistant coach with the man from 1991 to 1998), Magino’s credentials to be a top-tier collegiate coach speak for itself. So, needless to say, the Jayhawks have the coaching. So what else is left?
To put it plainly, the remainder of the team’s schedule. Next week’s opponent Iowa State should not be a problem. However, No. 5 Missouri – a contingent the Jayhawks are slated to play on Nov. 24 – is a big boulder in the way if the Jays expect to climb the mountain of perfection. And, if the Jays can prevail, the Big 12 Championship looms. And if North were to hypothetically meet South next Saturday, Kansas would find itself on the field against the Oklahoma Sooners.
If the Jays win those three contests and walk into a National Championship game against LSU or Oregon or whomever, the movie cameras should start rolling. No need to thank me, Hollywood, but I’ve already picked out a title already for the upcoming feature presentation on the Jays if they, somehow, someway, win that game too: “Jumpin’ Jehosephat! The Jays are National Jhamps.” Genius? It’s not a word I use lightly, but it might be just that.
The people in Kansas may be confused right now. But who wouldn’t be if, all of a sudden, a football team from your favorite school – a team that hasn’t seen true success since its appearance in the 1969 Orange Bowl – found itself in the National Title picture.
I guess those fans aren’t really in “Kansas” anymore. They’re on Cloud 9.
For the Jayhawks’ sake, let’s just hope the forecast doesn’t call for rain.
Assistant sports editor Matthew Murray is a Weinberg junior. He can be reached at [email protected].
