When a woman was sexually assaulted in her own room by a man she knew, the 23-year-old froze.

After going to court, working though therapy, and suffering confusion, self-blame and post-traumatic stress syndrome, she’s telling her story.

The Northwestern graduate student, who asked to remain anonymous, told about 60 women at Alpha Chi Omega Monday night how sexual assault affected her life.

She shared her story to heighten awareness of the issue and to encourage victims to seek help.

When the assault happened in the summer of 1996 while she was working in Canada, the survivor was living with six other people, including the man who assaulted her.

“I felt completely trapped,” she said. “I had the feeling of being frozen and not knowing how to get out of it. I knew that if I struggled or made any false move that what was happening could get a lot worse.”

After the assault, she said she was confused. She tried to put together what had happened to her, not knowing to label it as sexual assault.

“The days after that were so cloudy,” she said. “I didn’t feel anything. I was going through the motions of my life, pretending like nothing had happened.”

She was scared of pressing charges, telling her parents and beginning a court case that could be long and difficult — but she felt she had to do it. She made a statement to the police and started therapy while the court proceedings began.

A defense attorney questioned her housemates about her promiscuity, how much she partied, what kind of clothes she wore and how often she had men in her room.

“I don’t know how I coped with it at times,” she said. “Every day was a struggle.”

Her goal was not to see the assailant behind bars but to make sure he knew he was wrong and to prevent him from assaulting other women.

In court, she testified for five hours and was cross-examined for three and a half hours.

“When it was finally finished, I was exhausted and relieved and so happy to be able to put this part of it behind me,” she said.

Although the man was acquitted, she said she hopes her story encourages women who have had similar experiences to get help.

“I can’t back away from it,” she said. “If I can make one life breathe easier, then it’s a success.”

Contrary to what many people think, sexual assault can happen with “people you think you can trust,” she said.

“I don’t advocate living in fear, but I advocate trusting your gut instincts,” she said.

She said the best way to help victims is to listen without judging them and encourage them to seek help.

“If you suspect that someone might be dealing with something like this, don’t ignore it,” she said. “Support doesn’t have to come in flourishing phrases of psycho-babble. Just let them know that they’re not alone.”

Students said it was important to hear about sexual assault from someone who experienced it.

“You see a lot of the frustration and hardship of not only the assault but of what happens afterward,” Education junior Jenny Hoffman said. “It does make you think twice about what happens with sexual assault in the legal system.”