My boyfriend’s penis is just too large. We can’t find anything to satisfy the both of us. What should I do?

At some point, it seems that bigger isn’t always better. According to Columbia University’s Health Q&A Internet Service, “Oral sex, anal sex, or vaginal intercourse with a well-endowed man can be challenging. For some, the ‘gag reflex’ makes it difficult to have the entire shaft of the penis in one’s mouth. For others, penetration causes pain.” But there are a few ways to remedy this. First off, make sure you are totally ready to go before the two of you have sex. As mentioned in past weeks, a typical woman needs approximately 20 minutes of foreplay before she is ready to go. Next, know that lubrication is really important. If you need to, try using a water-based lube to get things going (but make sure it says water-based on the box, otherwise you could have some problems with condoms). Other than that, there are no hard-and-fast rules. You and your guy need to use basic communication skills to get things to a comfortable place. And if you are really having trouble with vaginal sex, maybe try switching to oral sex for a while and see if you get better results.

Emma is a sexual health reporter and a Medill sophomore. Send her your sex questions at [email protected].