After ample listserv abuse all across campus, our grand Sex Survey raked in 1,000 candid responses in a mere three days. Thanks to all of you compulsive e-mail checkers, survey fiends and midterm procrastinators out there, we proudly present our Sex Issue, chock full of analysis and commentary on the findings from Ellen DeBatty, our resident sexpert. And what did our needling inquiry into the naughtiness factor of this campus strip bare? Well, just shy of 60 percent of us have a significant other, while another 10 or so percent are still pondering how to label their “kind of” relationships. Want more? Around 30 percent of you are still in possession of the V-card. (Whether you’re proud of or frustrated with that is an entirely different story.) Also, an absurd 46 percent of women report never pleasuring themselves. But those facts and figures are simply a teaser for the full monty inside – if anything that’s got “sex” scribbled all over it didn’t pique your interest in the first place, of course. We figured a sexually enlightening quiz would be ideal foreplay, so check out this week’s Getting Graphic feature. In the latest Culture Blotter column, Emmy Blotnick backtracks a few steps before the bedroom romping begins with some imaginative pick-up pointers for the sex-starved. If you’re feeling a bit overexposed, learn a bit about the life of Pat Fitzgerald in Man on the Beat, an NU figure who gets ample exposure – on the field, that is. Finally, we’ve got your non-sexual addictions covered in this somewhat hedonistic issue, whether your guilty pleasure lies in Vince Vaughn rom-coms (see this week’s Low Brow), food porn in Why We Like or something of a more illegal variety in the case of our What If on drug detoxing for a job.