By Laura MoorePLAY Columnist

Next week most of us will be celebrating Thanksgiving, America’s most famous holiday invented to gloss over the utter devastation of millions of people – next to Atomic Bomb Day of course. Can’t wait ’til July 16 to celebrate that one! But I digress. Thanksgiving is a time of family merriment and celebrating America’s favorite pastime. No Virginia, not raping and pillaging. Eating!

Thanksgiving really serves no purpose other than to force me to unbutton my pants halfway through a massive meal in front of family and my dad’s coworkers. Joey from “Friends” was right, jeans have no give. But I’m worried about the rest of you. There’s been a lot of focus on thin Hollywood lately and if you’re not careful, those skinny bitches might make you rethink your third piece of pie. And that’s f-ing blasphemy.

There’s been speculation recently that the reason Nicole Richie looks so emaciated is that she got gastric bypass. Clearly, being only slightly pudge-tastic before, the surgery made her thin to the point of looking like some sort of anorexic fly. In fact, she may have flown into my car windshield the other day. Again, I digress. But Nicole’s weight loss (however it happened) got her lots of press coverage, including a feature in Vanity Fair and a tabloid cover story almost weekly.

And Nicole’s not the only one getting media attention as we all know. Mischa Barton, Mary-Kate Olsen, Kate Bosworth, Carson Daly (dude looks ill!) and a number of other starlets constantly bombard us with their ribcages and those legging-covered sticks they call legs. Sure US Weekly may say “Too thin?” on the cover, but then there’s a picture inside of said ing