Northwestern’s family institute has a program to get mothers and daughters talking.
Mothers and daughters aren’t communicating, especially on the topic of underage drinking, according to a 2005 survey by the Century Council, a nonprofit group that fights drunk driving and illegal drinking.
For seven years, the Mother-Daughter Connection program has worked with mothers and their 9- and 10-year-old daughters, discussing the issues preadolescents will soon face. The program reaches out to families in Chicago and the North Shore.
“The goal is to make sure their relationship is in a good place to face the challenges of adolescence,” said Catherine Weigel Foy, a coordinator of the Adoptive Families Program at the institute.
During the 10-week, $600 program, the groups meet once a week for 90 minutes. The participants cover topics of friendship, communication, conflict resolution and risky behavior, Weigel Foy said. She said there are usually no more than five mothers and five daughters in each group.
For five weeks, mothers and daughters are in separate sessions. The sessions are combined during the remaining weeks.
Students in NU’s master’s program in marital and family therapy can serve as co-facilitators for the group. While working on their degree, students are assigned to lead a therapy group as well as a group therapy course.
Alanna McNamara, a master’s student and a co-facilitator for a mother-daughter group at Near North Montessori School in Chicago, said she draws on her experiences from adolescence and having three sisters to relate to the girls. She works with four mothers and four daughters.
McNamara said she and her sisters have a close relationship with her mother and she tries to use that in the discussions.
“My goal is that (mothers and daughters are) empowered and see the strengths that they have in the mother-daughter relationship, and they see how good that can be and how much they can learn from each other,” McNamara said.
Most of the daughters didn’t seem aware of what their mothers had signed up for, said Emily Bates, another master’s student and McNamara’s teaching partner.
Nevertheless, both the mothers and daughters are invested in the program.
“The daughters have been open to it and they’re really, really excited about it,” McNamara said.
Bates emphasized the importance of hands-on experience from the therapy program.
“I’m learning how to facilitate a group with girls and girls and their mothers,” Bates said. “I’m learning how to promote their conversation and how to work with other therapists.”
Weigel Foy said she hopes to help mothers understand what their daughters are experiencing. She also wants to make the young girls more open to influence by their mothers.
McNamara and Bates have been assets to the program, Weigel Foy said.
“It certainly continues to be an educational opportunity for them,” she said. “Their skills and energy benefit the mothers and daughters.”
Reach Jasett Chatham at [email protected].
