The apocalypse is upon us and the television gods are bringing it not with fire and brimstone, but rather in the form of a merger of UPN and the WB networks.
The burning question (on the minds of all 30 of us who watch the channels) is which shows will be granted access to the heaven that is the newly dubbed CW, a combination of CBS and the WB – UPN gets the shaft right off the bat – and which ones will be cast into certain cancellation.
I found out which shows are basically guaranteed to continue on their magical journey of critical acclaim and mediocre ratings. Gilmore Girls, Everybody Hates Chris, Beauty and the Geek, and Veronica Mars have been saved. And what about every sorority girl’s favorite reality gem? Well, when life hands America’s Next Top Model a leMonday, Janice Dickinson calls it fat and tells it that it would never make it in “the business,” so network execs were already shamed into renewing the show for another season before the merger occurred. Long live bulimia!
But it’s the other shows – waiting in a television purgatory of sorts – that need someone to fight against their termination. This is my chance to stand up for shows I truly believe in. Below are the chosen ones.
What I Like About You: Part of the WB’s current Friday-night lineup, the show stars Jennie Garth, but you may know her as Kelly from Beverly Hills, 90201. I ask you, Has the cast of 90210 not suffered enough? Must we rob another former cast member of gainful employment? Don’t we have enough Tori “Horseface” Spellings and Ian “Nothin’ but Steve” Zierings running amok on the streets of Hollywood? We do, trust me.
Girlfriends: One of UPN’s acclaimed comedies starring Tracee Ellis Ross and created by Mara Brock Akil, Medill ’92. It’s easily the funniest show on the network next to Everybody Hates Chris, and you have to show some loyalty to an NU girl. Plus, you can only watch so much of pretty white teens with problems. (That was a dig at One Tree Hill. I hate One Tree Hill. Except I’m psyched they gave Minkus from Boy Meets World another shot at fame. In your face, Cory Matthews.)
Get This Party Started: Though this show is yet to air, I pray that it gets picked up by CW. Why? Because it stars Kristin from Laguna Beach and it’s sort of like Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, but with parties instead of homes. Needless to say, awesomeness will ensue; and really, I think we can all appreciate any show that will keep Kristin from pursuing an acting career. Although she did score a part in an Al Pacino movie (which was the first sign of this apocalypse).
Honestly, though, I’ll support any show the new network chooses to greenlight – unless it’s 7th Heaven. Why won’t that show just die already?
Medill Junior Laura Moore is a PLAY pop culture columnist. She can be reached at [email protected].
