A common complaint as people begin senior year pertains to the ever-shrinking pool of available people to hook up with.
Freshman year, for the most part, every face is a new one, and it seems like college is just going to be morning after morning of waking up next to a new body. Well folks, I’m here to tell you that’s not gonna happen. By your fourth year your pool is one-quarter the size it was when you started at Northwestern. The older boy you used to drool over from afar is now even farther, living in New York and working at a consulting firm. And the younger girls — although you won’t rule them out — are starting to seem pretty young.
Senior year is about making the most of your final days of college. It’s for taking on new challenges. For some, that means writing a thesis or taking the LSAT. For others, it’s joining, or even starting a new club. For me, it meant sucking up my embarrassment and fear, and applying for a weekly sex column.
But for a small group of my single friends the new challenge is one they appropriately call, simply, The Senior Challenge.
The Senior Challenge is a competition that my roommates are ready to conquer. The goal is simple: to hook up with a freshman, a sophomore, a junior, a senior, an alumni and a campus random (this includes people you may meet on campus who are not NU students). At this point you are probably thinking that seniors at a prestigious university such as ours, who pay tens of thousands of dollars in tuition per year, should be pursuing higher causes than kissing boys of all ages.
But in their defense, when they are not at the 1800 Club searching for their next victim, the challenge participants are doing school work, holding jobs and living at Career Services trying to make a plan for next year. And with all the stress of senior year, everyone deserves to have a little fun.
The leader in the challenge has already had three conquests. The first, oddly enough, was the freshman. She treated him as any senior girl would treat a freshman guy. She met him at a bar, told him about the challenge and told him she wanted to kiss him. She took him outside, made out with him until she had enough, and then went back in to continue her night.
The second conquest I was lucky enough to witness myself when I returned home one night only to see my friend on our porch couch, sucking face with a fellow senior. When I returned to the porch later that night she was nowhere to be found, and I didn’t see her again until the next morning, when I woke up at 7 a.m. to the phone ringing. My roommate had retuned home, without a key and still in her clothes from the night before.
The final guy she has won over is an alumni, now a graduate student, that she met at the Deuce. She kissed him, denied his request to take her home and is now on her way to completing the challenge long before graduation.
This roommate of mine is walking proof that even for a senior, physical intimacy is possible, regardless of whether you have a significant other. If you want some, you can get some.
And, if you are a sophomore or junior and you would like to be the next mark on my roommate’s scorecard, shoot me an email. She’s really hot.