President Obama has been saying a lot of things lately, with varying degrees of approval among the fabled 99 percent. Here’s one Obama-ism we totally endorse, though: This week, the President told Jay Leno on “The Tonight Show” that “Keeping Up With The Kardashians” is prohibited in the White House. “I have not seen the show,” he said, and told Leno that his daughters Sasha and Malia aren’t allowed to tune in either. No televised at-home Brazilian waxes in the Green Room? We’ll back you up on that one, Commander-in-Chief.

Backstreet Boy Kevin Richardson announced plans this week to rejoin his reunited boy band on an upcoming cruise tour after a five-year hiatus. Richardson’s return is awesome in its own right for restoring the original lineup, but what’s even more impressive is that his announcement inadvertently caused headline writers’ brains to explode all over the globe. Kevin Richardson’s back … all right?! Without Kevin, the BSB were … incomplete?! The sheer number of wordplay possibilities was literally mind-blowing, and it seems a sweeping epidemic of mental short-circuitry among America’s pop-culture pundits ensued. But fear not: Reports show that Gawker is expected to be fully functional again by next Wednesday.

Hey pretty baby with the Adidas cleats on! Paris Jackson, daughter of the late King of Pop Michael Jackson, appears to have inherited some fancy-footwork genes from her famous dad – but on the field rather than the dance floor. Thirteen-year-old Paris is the first girl to join her school’s flag football team and reportedly makes one ferocious linebacker. Supportive brothers Prince and Blanket cheered her team to a dominant 32-6 victory over the weekend. Clearly, no Jackson wants to be defeated.

Former child actor (and inexplicable sudden quasi-hottie) Jonathan Lipnicki proved he’s all grown up now by spending his 21st birthday at Las Vegas’ swanky XS Nightclub with his family and friends … plus, you know, a few jaw-dropping model friends, too. Casual. The onetime kiddie star, best known for his role as precocious, bespectacled Ray in 1997’s Jerry Maguire, reportedly made several stunning female friends on location. We’re betting the “After my dad died, my mom used to take me to the zoo” sob story still works pretty well, but a wild guess says that this time, those late-night conversations didn’t end abruptly with “My mom’s coming! I gotta go to bed!”