Confirmed & Denied

Weekly editors

GREEKEND (G)RECAPThose who became fiendishly invested in SAE’s Paddy Murphy Week gathered at The Keg on Saturday, where the winner was revealed at midnight. The crowd seemed shocked to hear it was TriDelt after houses KD, A Phi and Pi Phi had strong performances in the week’s events. Seems the winning ladies found a loophole: Turning in a fat stack of receipts from Wild Dogz and Cosi, two eateries that had agreed to donate to SAE’s philanthropy, which were tallied as points. From what SAE coaches told us, the receipts gave TriDelt the lead – to think, all it took was either a hot dog binge or a dumpster dive! Classy behavior all around, sororosisters; maybe next year everyone can go on a scavenger hunt in search of some perspective.

THE HIGHLIGHTS OF FANTASIANORML’s screening of the 1940s Disney film “Fantasia” in Tech on 4/20 sounds like it was a pothead’s paradise. One moviegoer told us that “everyone there had goofy looks on their faces” – sweet mother Mary Jane, are we shocked! NORML members passed out bubbles, giving the crowd a chance to show off their exhalation skills. Bubbles were followed by drug policy trivia with wizard hats for prizes. In a perfect school, we’d be rewarded with wizard caps every time we answered a question correctly (you can get to work on that now, new ASG administration). The sounds of rustling chip bags and munching echoed through LR3, with viewers gasping and bursting into giggles even during the not-so-funny parts. Another attendee told us everyone laughed during a scene about mushrooms (he referred to it just as “that mushroom scene” as though we’re a bunch of Fantasia scholars). The fun came to a halt when the DVD stopped working and nobody had the attention span to repair it. As this week’s Social Diarist lamented: “Silly stoners.” Drug Week rules.

B-DAY BLACKOUTSJudging by the number of 21st birthday party Evites flooding our spam folder this week, it seems like July of 1988 was a month of sweaty humping for parents of NU students everywhere. One birthday girl told us she’s looking forward to “finally becoming legal after six years of drinking” and will celebrate in Lincoln Park. Also, a birthday extravaganza held by 808 Productions will be going down at the pulsing hair gel convention that is Enclave. But wait, it gets better: Co-coordinator Jordan Simkovic claims a Pussycat Doll will make an appearance. We’ve never seen a Pussycat Doll separated from her crew of honeys; we can only imagine she looks like a lady of the night venturing out from under the bridge (that’s some grandpa talk for a prostitute, you guys). In any case, happy birthday to all, and to all a good bar fight.