It’s a shame that Northwestern can’t compete with Stanford or Duke on the playing field. Sure, once in a while we may be able to beat them in fencing or golf, but we don’t come remotely close to winning six consecutive Sears trophies as one of the nation’s top all-around athletic programs. Our athletic director serves up lame-ass excuses like “the winters are better there (in Palo Alto).” But that whining excuse is just an easy escape route. Such a trivial fact like the weather applies to all students.

We don’t have a shortage of braniacs. No, we have a shortage of top-notch athletes. Last time I checked, the basketball team played indoors, and football’s schedule includes a maximum of two games in our chilly Novembers. How come Michigan, Michigan State and Penn State all managed to finish in the top 10 in football this past season with equivalent weather conditions?

The answer is simple. It’s not the weather — it’s our track record. NU has plenty to offer its student athletes, and that’s why every athlete here, including myself, decided to attend. What it doesn’t have is good teams, and that is because it doesn’t have the best players.

So what’s the secret ingredient? Why can we compete in the classroom, but not on the field? Admissions.

We are too scared to let in a couple of athletes whose SAT scores may lower the university’s average by a tenth of a point. I have seen it first-hand as coaches have their hands tied and can’t let in those one or two stars that make a difference in a program.

University President Henry Bienen himself said he “refused to compromise the academic standards of the university for good teams.” This roll-over-and-die attitude is limiting progress and, in some ways, negating it. If you think athletic teams have no impact on your life or college experience, then wake up. A couple successful teams around here could build morale better than any tap dance recital. It might give everyone something to be proud of and make those crappy winters go by a little quicker.

It also might spread the word about our school and the quality of education it has to offer. Nationally, Stanford and Duke are more recognized than NU. And in case you haven’t noticed, it is hard to sit through a Duke or Stanford basketball game without hearing a reference to how good an academic institution it is. When you are playing 20 times a year on national television, that is a lot of positive publicity.

But when you’re only on television because you’re getting your ass kicked by one of these teams or your games are being played on Fox Sports at 3 a.m., chances are the target audience is substantially smaller. It is no secret that the admissions department was flooded with applications following our Rose Bowl run.

So, for everyone who is so worried with compromising any academic standards — Mr. President, this includes you — an increase in applicants would lead to a larger pool of students from which you can hand-pick the very best. Your nice little averages and cute statistics will stay as high as you want, and maybe we’ll move up in the next edition of U.S. News & World Report college rankings instead of down.

Nationally competitive teams and perhaps a bowl game here and there actually might help you with that billion-dollar campaign you seem so occupied with lately. I would be more likely to donate some cash back to my alma mater if I were getting an ego boost every time I switched on a college football game.

It may be unfair to compare NU with other schools in the Big Ten because we do have high academic standards for athletes, but why are we in the Big Ten if we don’t want to be compared to them. The Big Ten is the best thing we have going for us. Many athletes would never consider NU if it weren’t for the top tier competition. One thing is for certain though: There are schools (Stanford, Duke, Notre Dame, Michigan) doing it, while we are still trying to figure out how.